I thought it would be easy and fun. This time I thought it would be different, but I was wrong. I am always wrong when it comes to being crafty. You know who says it’s easy? Crafty people.
Back in October our family took a cruise to the Bahamas to celebrate the 40th birthday of our daughter-in-law. Every night at dinner our grandchildren were amazed, giving wide-eyed attention to one of our servers who would make origami critters for them. One night she made barking dogs. The next day she made leaping frogs. Making one for each of them so that they could have frog races. They were delighted and always surprised by what she made. She would make magic happen with any piece of paper she could find laying around, and she never disappointed them.
They came home with those treasures, which were magical memories. So, I thought, “I can do that”. I could make origami critters for them to play with. We could even make them together. The crucial word here is “thought”. I think a lot of things. My super power is “thinking”. Actually transforming thoughts into something tangible, well that’s where I run into a bit of trouble.
You see, in school I was always the kid, perhaps the only kid, who didn’t like going to art class. To be fair, I didn’t like going to math either. It was a toss up as to which one I disliked more, but both were required up until high school. At that point someone came to their senses and realized not everyone is artistic, and for some it’s torturous. That would be me! Unfortunately they didn’t feel the same about math. That would remain my nemesis.
Pushing onward I asked my husband, Kim, for an “easy” origami kit for Christmas. Nothing too complicated. I didn’t need to make anything fancy. I know who I am after all, or do I? Apparently he knows, because what he gave me wasn’t just any “easy” origami kit, it was an origami kit with patterns, and a guide book “for children”. If you are wondering, no, I did not take offense. That came later, and it wasn’t directed at him.
I opened the pages of the guide book and began with a sailor shirt I found in the book labeled, “easy”. The squares of multi-colored paper come numbered, so you know which one goes with which set of directions. There were dotted lines to show you where to fold the paper. Even I could fold along a dotted line. Wow! I surprised myself! I did it! I made an origami sailor shirt. Next I took on a cat, but she came with a tricky fold, called a “mountain fold”. Hmmm? Trying to match a 2 dimensional drawing of arrows, and translating that into a 3 dimensional shape was testing my limits of understanding, but with some perseverance I produced a pretty cute cat. Onward I went! Next came the ice cream cone. Boy, wouldn’t my grandkids be impressed with me! Nope! No they would not, because I ran head long into the “pleated” fold! I was only three patterns into a book written for 5 year olds and I was in over my head! I tried and tried again. There were arrows and instructions to flip the paper over. Two parallel lines that indicated where I should fold down and then up, or was that up and then down? No matter how I attempted this maneuver I could not manage to make that paper look anything like the picture. The paper isn’t plain. It’s colored and patterned, so you’d think by just looking it would give me an idea of what should come next, but no! It didn’t work that way! All I could be grateful for was that I was not in a room with a handful of 5 year olds who were successfully folding ice cream cones, when what I had managed was to make one that looked like I had left it in the backseat of the car on a hot summer day! Frustration mounting, I stuffed the whole thing away before Kim realized I was a failure at folding paper. Instead, I showed off my sailor shirt and cat, pretending that was all I had time to make that day.
When Valentine’s day rolled around I hadn’t had the chance to get out and buy Kim a card, so I decided to give my origami skills another shot. I would make him something surprising and special. Flipping through the patterns I landed on a butterfly. That seemed appropriate for the occasion. Butterflies are in book 2, labeled “More Difficult”. I should have read that first. I didn’t! The directions read, “Start with waterbomb base”. What does that mean? There was no further explanation. Maybe that’s just the correct piece of paper. Marching onward I successfully completed the “Valley Fold”. Now, “Flip the figure over”. Can do. Another “Valley Fold”. Got it. Then it said to, “note the curved parts where it’s folded out”. Let me stop you right here! I am looking at a folded piece of paper that looks like a triangle. Triangles have straight edges, right? Hmm? This must be right out of the geometry class where I barely squeaked by! I found no such curved parts anywhere, but we’ll proceed on the premise that I noted them. Who’s going to know any different? Then we go to a “Mountain Fold”. Easy enough. This was followed by, “flip the figure over, and finish up with a fold to an angle of 120 degrees”. Whoa!! Back up to 120 degrees! Just what is that? I already told you art and math are in close company in my book. I know 90 degrees, 180, and even 360, but 120!? Off the cuff? Don’t you need a compass, or protractor, or something to figure that out? Are 5 year olds using those complex tools in kindergarten? I took a guess and folded somewhere between 90 and 180, willy nilly like. It was here that I should have held a paper butterfly in my hands. Instead I held a piece of paper folded into many different angles and resembling exactly that, not a butterfly. Not even close!
I took that piece of paper and simply pressed the creases flat that I had made leading to nowhere, and turned from page 26 back to page 11 in the “easy” book, where I found a boat. A simple, easy to understand, valley fold this way, turn it over and valley fold that way, and in no time at all I had a sweet little origami boat, upon which I wrote, “Come sail away with me”. He loved it!
Of course I could have saved myself two and a half hours of aggravation, and the unwelcomed realization that I don’t possess the artistic ability of a 5 year old by simply buying a card, but where’s the fun in that? Fun? Now that’s an interesting word.
The Fun Squad on our next cruise was holding a towel folding class. You know the kind where they fold towels into cute little animals. The family thought that would be fun, but you can’t fool me. That is nothing more than origami with linens! Pass!